


Jalousie

by Canadian_nights



Category: Cardinal (TV 2017)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-26
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-16 19:35:28
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,648
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29705544
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Canadian_nights/pseuds/Canadian_nights
Summary: As a big fan of a bit of jealousy in fics I figured it was about time that we saw that through Lise's fiery French Canadian eyes... with a very bemused John caught in the crossfire. I am sure we all know who will win this heart ❤Happy Belated Valentines!
Relationships: John Cardinal & Lise Delorme, John Cardinal/Lise Delorme
Comments: 2
Kudos: 13





	1. Saint-Valentin

**Author's Note:**

> I had intended to post this last weekend but work and life got in the way.  
> I'm finally going to start the scarily grown up job I want after 9 years of training- So apart from covid everything is looking a lot more on track which I think is why I am a little less happy with this than my usual writing as I have needed less of an escape from reality. Still I hope people enjoy and forgive me the slower updates...

February 14th had never meant all that much to Lise. A tacky, money spinning exercise that didn’t appeal in any way. She didn’t need to be inundated with flowers and chocolate to feel validated in a relationship or to receive a secret valentine to put a spring in her step. To be honest, as she cradled an overly large glass of merlot and ran through the car crash of her love life, she was feeling pretty done with men in general. Josh had, at the time, seemed the right option; but her life had progressed in a new direction and he hadn’t been able, or maybe had never wanted, to grow along with her. By the time she had realised they were just going through the motions with each other it was too late. The thought of having a family with a man she already knew she could never love was the final, overwhelming nail in the coffin of their relationship. The only regret that stuck with her was the hurt it had caused the person she had once called a friend.

Running a scoldingly hot bath, Lise filled it with rose scented bubbles before sliding into the comforting embrace of the frothy water. One innocent glass turned into two and then three and in the dim warmth of her bathroom the confident veneer melted away, leaving her alone with only her vulnerabilities for company.

There was one man who Lise always looked forward to seeing and that flicker of longing terrified her so much more than the prospect of being forever alone. Their relationship had been the slowest of burns but somehow with him… only him, it constantly felt like being on the most exhilarating rollercoaster of her life. He had opened her eyes to what she wanted from her career and exposed a confidence that she didn’t know she possessed, both with and without her badge. In the last few dark and difficult months, Lise had come to realise that he was the real reason she was still in Algonquin Bay. The tantalising hope that he would one day see her as more than just a friend was the true reason that she hadn’t even considered dating again or given a second glance to any of the other men who had walked into her life. 

John Cardinal was the forbidden fruit. He should have been too old, too broken, too like her…

In reality he was the only person who had ever got inside her walls, into her head and most terrifying of all, into her heart. His was the face she saw when she closed her eyes at night and the first person she thought of in the morning. Against all the logic she prided herself on possessing; Cardinal’s vulnerable, secret smile had become almost as important to her existence as the air she breathed. 

That was why it was so painful when she lost him, cut off cruelly and abruptly for what felt like the longest twelve months of her life. When Catherine had died, he had fallen off the rails, spiralling angrily into a dark and desolate abyss. The pain of watching him grieve alone, drowning in hurt and anger, whilst actively pushing her comfort away, almost broke Lise too. The relief she felt when he finally found his way back into her orbit was earthshattering. So, she had settled for the consolation of his newly tentative friendship- because she was too cowardly to risk losing him from her life forever. 

*****

It was a frosty Monday morning, but the cold of the Algonquin bay winter hadn’t followed Lise into the precinct where the buzz of the weekend’s activity was fuelling the gossip train. Lise had just about managed to suppress a melodramatic eye roll as she ducked out of the coffee room, escaping the chatter between the youngest members of the station about the nauseating way’s they had spent Valentine’s this year. Settling back down at her desk she let the rejuvenating hot liquid warm through her tired bones, hearing herself let out an audible sigh and wondering when she had got so old and grumpy. 

Her eyes instinctively tracked John as he stepped into the office. His face was creased in concentration, a heavy weight tugging at his dark brow that filled her with an unsettling wave of concern. He had been hit so hard by the most recent case. His strong exterior guarding a still very vulnerable core which she knew meant he was more rattled than he should have been by how much the victim reminded him of Kelly. The traumatic nature of the murder and preceding events had driven Dyson to draft in an external counsellor, although John hadn’t particularly engaged. 

So lost in his thoughts, John’s eyes didn’t leave his desk as he sifted through the papers between sips of coffee, leaving Lise free to quietly observe him over her mug. Her attention peaked acutely when he stumbled upon a pale pink envelope amongst his mail, all subtlety lost as she found herself staring in earnest at the heart embellished card that he quickly worked free. As his focus turned to the message inside, Lise could barely concentrate over the thud of her now bounding heart. A boyish, cheeky smile warmed his features which made her tingle with longing before the familiar cloud of jealousy returned. Jealousy that was once so cruelly directed at the wife he held on a pedestal and was now firmly targeted at the sender of the pink tacky card that looked so out of place in his strong, rough fingers. 

Her stomach fell at the twinkle of light that filled his eyes for the briefest moment before he regained his composure, finding herself irrationally hurt that someone else had made him smile. When he finally looked up, Lise savoured the endearing flush that warmed his cheeks as his eyebrows arched, contorting his face into a devilishly handsome expression with a lopsided grin that was tinged with feigned innocence. Feeling the heat prickling in her own cheeks and unable to offer an explanation for her ridiculous response to an undoubtedly innocent Valentines’ card, Lise buried her head in her computer, busying herself with emails and actively ignoring the heavy gaze burning into her from his side of the desk dividers.


	2. Darkness (John)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A slight step back in time from John's perspective and an introduction to a new face in the office.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For me this seemed to take forever to get to - so I apologise for the delay to this update. It's a little bit longer than the first and a bit of setting the scene. Hopefully will be another update soon - depending on how busy I am...
> 
> I hope you enjoy and happy Friday 😀

The darkness of this year’s winter seemed never ending to John as he drove into work along the frozen streets. It was 06.30 and the sun was a long way from making its presence known over the bleak January horizon. Most of the team would still be in bed, putting off for as long as possible the inevitable start to the working day. For John though, the familiarity of the office was a comfort. The long nights where especially hard still. The apartment he was renting felt as cold and empty as the icy tundra outside and the hours dragged out in lonely silence whilst the relief of sleep evaded him. 

After Catherine, work had been a welcome distraction. The lull of autumn had him aching for a big case. His mind and body so keenly needing the adrenaline and the danger and, more than anything, the mental exhaustion that came with being fully submerged in a difficult investigation.   
That was until this case came along…

It had started inconspicuously enough. The disappearance of three college girls, back in Algonquin bay for the holidays. At the start it had seemed likely they had simply decided they had had enough of the dreary streets of home, returning back sooner than their families had expected to the big lights and excitement of Toronto. As the days had rolled by though, with no word or sightings, the anxiety in the town had ratcheted up as had the tension in the station. It had still been an open missing person’s case. It had still been possible that there would be a good outcome… 

Then they had found her. Semi submerged in a melting snowdrift. Frozen and alone. 

When John had looked into the icy features of her face - he had seen his daughter. The resemblance so startling that his heart had shuddered to an earth-shaking stop, time standing still whilst the familiar high-pitched ring of fear screeched in his ears. It had been Lise who had noticed him frozen in shock. Lise who had covered for him; taking charge with a reassuring nod whilst he pulled himself together. It wasn’t Kelly. Deep down he knew that of course. The problem was, after Catherine, he was still more fragile than he was prepared to admit and coming face to face with another innocent life cut cruelly short was difficult to process. 

Lise knew what was going through his mind that morning but she didn’t speak it. For that he was grateful, as he always was of his partner. Grateful for her tact and for her ability to read him so accurately; knowing what he was thinking- even, at times like this, before he had processed what that was for himself. 

He had stood in her shadow. Watching in silent awe, as she ran the recovery and organised the forensic search whilst he felt as though he was barely catching his breath.   
When they got back to the station that afternoon, they had moved into a murder investigation. The tension was palpable in the briefing, as Dyson filled in the team, and John knew from the faces around the table that he wasn’t the only father in the room who was desperate for a better outcome for the remaining two girls. 

That had been over a week ago and despite working around the clock they were no closer to finding any leads to the killer or the missing friends. With every passing day the adrenaline and expectation of the team was slowly morphing into frustration and unwanted anxiety. 

*****

Arriving at the station that morning he had settled into his usual routine, blinking his tired stinging eyes as the harsh white of the strip lights hummed and flickered to life around him whilst he mechanically warmed up the coffee machine. Sadly, the caffeine had been less effective than he had hoped and by the time 9 am rolled around and Dyson called everyone into the briefing room his mood was far from good. Her words were about as optimistic as he felt as she divided up the tasks at the start of the new day. As the shuffle of feet and chairs rumbled in unison, signifying the end of the meeting, Dyson abruptly cleared her throat. Swiftly halting the exodus. Beckoning an unfamiliar face from the doorway she addressed the room. 

“I would like you all to meet Eilidh Bradshaw. She will be working with us all for the next few weeks in a pastoral capacity.” 

John was sure Dyson’s gaze lingered on him for a bit too long and he felt himself prickling, already more than a little defensive that this new development was more for his benefit than many of his colleagues.

“She is a very experienced trauma counsellor and since we have all been through more than our fair share of that in the last 12 months, we feel that her input will be good for the team.”

As Eilidh spoke, her voice assured and soft, John found he had already lost interest in the words coming out of her mouth. His brain concentrating instead, with a belligerent determination, on how he was going to avoid being drawn by Dyson into spilling his feelings to a complete stranger.   
Studying her silently, an immediate feeling of uneasiness settled in his stomach. She was tall and slim, her fair hair artificially lightened giving her pale skin an almost ethereal quality. Her vivid blue eyes were engaging enough, flickering around the room with an air of a confident professional who knew how to engage a crowd. It would take more though than a cheerful smile though, John found his inner voice grumbling, for him to trust her.

*****

When Eilidh had sought him out at his desk later that afternoon it had flustered him. He could feel Lise’s eyes burning into his temple as he turned his face towards the counsellor. Strangely it was Lise’s deep brown orbs that were etched in his vision, obscuring from focus the face of the woman talking at him. Her words once again washing over him in a blur, as his brain wrestled with his body. Futilely attempting to suppress the burning heat that was rising up his neck in a creeping uncontrollable flush that had nothing to do with the unfamiliar fingertips on his shoulder and everything to do with the way Lise was looking at him. 

For john it was the most unnerving awakening. A fluttering rush of awareness in the depths of his gut for the first time what felt like a lifetime. It wasn’t just an innocent warmth he was feeling. It was a long buried physical desire. A raw need that he had thought had died along with his wife. The abruptness was startling, hitting him like a juggernaut completely out of the blue. Just as terrifying was that the focus of this jumbled rush of feelings was his partner. His friend. His confidante… 

…Delorme. 

Lise’s focus had been drawn up from her paperwork by an unfamiliar laugh. The counsellor had clearly given up waiting on John coming to her, cornering him at his desk instead. Unable to pull her gaze away, Lise watched as the pretty blonde engaged John in conversation, edging closer until her fingers were brushing over the thin fabric covering his bicep. It was the unmistakable flush of red creeping up from under his collar that really irritated Lise. She could cope with him being flirted with; she had seen that before. But watching him react so physically to another woman’s touch was hard to swallow. 

Lise had avoided him for the rest of the day, sifting through CCTV images away from her desk. The office had emptied by the time she had finished and as she returned her cup to the coffee room, before calling it a night, she was caught off guard by John’s big frame appearing behind her.

“Hey. You ok?” 

He had made her jump and his hand instinctively reached out in reassurance, brushing against her spine in a gesture that suddenly felt far from innocent. 

“Mhmm”

It was a deliberately noncommittal reply that John didn’t pick up on. 

“Fancy dinner later? I’m cooking”

Lise could hear the hopeful smile in his voice but she hadn’t shaken off the irritation of his earlier actions and she suddenly wasn’t in the mood for a ‘friendly’ dinner. 

“Non... Sorry I have plans. Maybe another time.”

Without turning to look at him Lise swept back to her desk, pulling on her coat and leaving without saying goodbye.

It was hard for John to shake the disappointment he felt watching her leave without him. 

Over the last few months he had grown so accustomed to their Friday dinners. John couldn’t really remember when they had started gravitating together at the end of the week, relaxing on the couch with a nice bottle or a take out. It didn’t matter what they did. Over time it had become the best part of his week. Sometimes time would get away from them and Lise would fall asleep watching a movie, curled up in a tiny ball in the corner of his big sofa. Those had become his favourite nights. He would sit for hours listening to her gentle breathing, enjoying the way she would wriggle in her dreams, slurring incomprehensible French words as she slept. When he could eventually drag himself to bed, those were the nights he actually slept. The reassurance of her presence easing his anxious mind enough to let him drift off without the nightmares.


End file.
